Opposite day - a letter to Kinsley

For months upon months, dearest Kinsley, you have pushed every single button driving me batty.  You have done everything I told you NOT do.  You have put your fingers in your ears and ignored nearly everything I have asked you to do or to stop doing.  I declare today to be opposite day.
Please do the following:

• Tell your brother and sister they are a bad girl or boy
• Continue to act like a vampire
• Shut all of the doors
• Steal your siblings' toys, then run and laugh at them for crying
• Take 20 books off of your bookshelf and stash them in your bed.  Refuse to clean them up. 
• Yell, "Addyson!!!!" until your sister wakes up
• Poke and touch your sister during meal times

If you follow all of these commands, I will reward you with a cookie, ok? 

Love, 

Your crazy overworked Mommy