Weekend before the packers

This has been an insane week....of course the week before the packers come all of this had to happen.

• Addyson got a fever Tuesday morning, called the doctor (only because we had been exposed to someone who was hospitalized with the flu the week before), sure enough she tested positive for flu A.  Addyson and the twins were given tamiflu (last day of this medication today).  
• So, Addyson was home Tuesday and Wednesday from school.  
• Kinsley's school nurse called Wednesday telling me she was sent to her office twice for coughing (she had been coughing since Sunday - all we could do was give her the rescue inhaler, and she did not have a fever any of these days), so I picked her up from school.  
• Thursday Kinsley had a pulmonologist appointment two hours away, which took up my entire day.  This was also the girls' last dance class, so it was imperative that I get home in time (I was ten minutes late - I tried).  
• Yesterday, Kinsley had an appointment near the end of the day with her regular pediatrician.  

I spent pockets of time organizing and sorting for the packers, but this weekend is the last chance.  We have the downstairs part of the house to complete to include:  living room, kitchen, and toy room.

It will get done, it will get done, it will get done....

Distraction from the packing....my journey one year later

What I shared with the amazing fitness group I teach:
This is pushing me waaaaaayyyy past my comfort zone, but I have to share in hopes to give someone else the push to start or continue their journey.  Cannot believe it has been a year since I started my journey of putting ME first.  My health, my fitness, and my heart.  For the past couple of years I have worked out on my own either at home, a variety of classes @ the gym, or upstairs @ the gym.  I was maintaining and staying in my comfort zone.  A dear friend kept trying to get me to try out Body Blast with her, but I was scared!

I wasn't sure how the twins would behave during class (they were 4 at the times) and I had been watching from upstairs Body Blast and it looked INSANE, and definitely something I could not do.  After more and more prodding from Quiana, I finally decided to try out the class.  It was hard, yes, but I did it and the twins behaved.  I was sore, I was whipped, and pushed beyond any exercise I had been doing on my own.  Last December, I started to regularly attend Body Blast whenever I could.  I felt great, and loved the class.  I stayed in the back, making sure to stay away from any and all attention.  Back left corner to be exact.  Once the school year came to an end (May), and I had seen Quiana's changes first hand I very timidly decided it was time to get to the bottom of my eating and ask a personal trainer to help me.  I knew I could push myself in the work outs, but I wanted to achieve more.  I wanted to finally change.  I was extremely nervous to see the changes she would ask of me, but I was NOT happy and wanted happiness.


I had absolutely NO idea that I could be successful, as I struggle deeply with a lack of confidence.  I like to hide behind clothes, hide my body in pictures by always staying in the back, or putting my children in front.  I was ashamed.  Ever since my oldest was born (6 years ago), I struggled with high blood pressure off and on.  I “thought” I was eating right and exercised five times a week, but it was still lingering around.  And migraines!!!  Migraines that required meds, made me vomit, and had to sleep them off.  Life was not enjoyable.


The trainer had me gradually change my diet to a clean diet and what happened beyond the food and the weight was more than I could have ever dreamt of:
* I lost 50 pounds in three months
* Came off all medications
* Migraines decreased and I found the trigger (dairy)
* Ran my first race, the Volkslauf
* Made friends who have and continue to inspire me daily


More than all that, though, I have found ME. I have found the light I was lacking in my life.  I have taken steps towards becoming a Christian, and developing my relationship with God (something I was not ready for when I started this journey, nor did I ever imagine it being a goal).  By listening to God and surrounding myself with amazing women, I was directed into becoming a certified group fitness instructor.  It was NOT my plan.  I am a certified middle school teacher and planned to start teaching in the classroom this upcoming school year, and then I was put in this position.  I was approached and I was pushed.  I did NOT ask for this.  I liked my comfort zone of the back of the class.  There was NOOOOOOOOOOOO way I would go in front of women.  I was not fit enough, I was not skinny enough, simply….I did not feel like I was enough.

I am so incredibly grateful for this group.  My heart is in this group and when I tell you I understand your struggles, I DO! This life is still very new, and I am not strong on my feet, I still waver, and continue to work on me.  But, more importantly, I hope that I can help some of you who are in the same position know that you are not alone, and that you, too, deserve to be happy and have a sparkle and light in your eyes.  Life is sooooo much happier and enjoyable when it happens.  I want other women to feel the empowerment, support, and love from our group just as I was shown.  So to those who have been coming and those that are new to our group, I hope you have found that special feeling this group has given to me and so many others.


I am beyond thankful for everyone who has been with me through this journey and believed in me.  Thank you for making me a part of your group and welcoming me with open arms.  I am simply blessed.

Sorting

No one, nor any documents can truly prepare you for a move like this.  Not only am I going through a rollercoaster of emotions, but the madness of deciding what to store, what to sell, what to donate, and what to bring is an insanely difficult process.

Yes, it is just "stuff."  But, this "stuff" makes us feel like we have a home, especially with the amount of times we have and will continue to move.

This weekend Cody spent his time sorting through the outdoor storage sheds.  The garbage can is full and the house is full of items to sell and donate.  We have one shed organized with items we are taking with us, and the other with items we are storing for two years.

We can't pack much of anything, because the Army has to, in order for it to be covered by their insurance.  So what we can and can't do is limited.  My mind does not shut off with things to accomplish and it's just getting closer and closer which makes it even more overwhelming.

AND....to add into the mix of all this madness, I signed up to take my personal training course and certification.  So, on top of all the moving madness, I've also created a new task list (meeting with counselor, paperwork, accounts, etc)...and the course starts next month, but I have till August to get it completed.  What was I THINKING?!

We are here....underneath a pile of "stuff" trying to figure out this new adventure.

Plane tickets

• We have been in Illinois for the past two weeks visiting family, and came home last Thursday.  
• We had to reorganize the new toys, and start immediately sorting and organizing what is and isn't going with us to Korea.  
• Three whole closets in our house have been converted for this, and we still have an entire house to complete. 
• The kids were supposed to go back to school Monday, but due to snow and then frigid temperatures, today (a two hour delay, at that) will be their first day back.  
• It really hasn't bothered me to be home these extra days with them, mostly because we hadn't been home to relax since visiting so we enjoyed the time to do that these past couple days.  
• Cody went to talk to travel yesterday and they went ahead and booked us our plane tickets for Korea.  (It's happening!!!!!)  
• We leave March 1st, people!!!  Less then two months to go and yes, I am having straight anxiety about it all.  
• We will be heading to a hotel two days before hand so we can clear our house we are currently in and for Cody to clear his unit.  
• We leave at night and are going to be stuck in an airport on the other side of the country for 10 hours.  Start praying now for our sanity.  

Heartbreak for little girls......

is cancelling their dance recital.  

Why?

Weather.....but it was based on a prediction and not what actually happened.  The roads were supposed to ice, but they did not.  The girls have dance costumes hanging in a closet waiting and wanting to be worn, and Kinsley (especially) keeps asking if it is dance recital day.  

There is a small chance that they will reschedule for this week....which we are hoping and praying for, because little girls should not have such heartache.  

Dates

The other night Cody and I had to finalize the dates transportation will come for their three pick ups.

First we have to have them pick up our unaccompanied baggage (this baggage is supposed to arrive soon after we arrive, and can only be 500 pounds).

Second comes the packers for our house hold goods (half of our belongings - that may take 1-4 months to arrive).

Finally, they come to pack up the other half of our belongings that will be stored for two years.

All these dates are in February, which means come January we will be tearing this house up from top to bottom, sorting and organizing.

Picking these dates made it seem even more real.  The Army won't be changing the orders, we WILL be leaving.

We had plans to send some items to my parents house this weekend by doing a vehicle switcheroo.  My mom was going to bring down the truck and she would take our van back up.  We planned on loading up the van, and then when we come up next weekend we would load the truck up with the rest.  Well....this weather has us on a standstill.  If it starts to get as bad as they predict, then she won't be able to come down.  Not only was she coming down to bring items back, but for the girls' dance recital.

We are stuck waiting to see what happens with the weather, and I have not done a single thing to prepare for her to come. If she comes it won't be till 10 tonight, so I am going to wait until she leaves and if she is coming, I'll start scrubbing the house, making her room up, and picking up groceries.  Who wants to do all that work for nothing?  Not me....so I am waiting till the last possible minute.

First snow of the year

We have lived in Missouri for three winters and not ONCE have we bought a sled.  Our first winter here (we arrived in December) it snowed a good snow.  We played for days!!!

This year, our last winter in Missouri, we decide to buy sleds.  Makes zero sense, I know, but we wanted to create memories.

Thursday evening Addyson and Eligh got to go sledding, while I stayed inside with Kinsley (she was still recovering from being sick).

Friday I took the kids out twice to play and then again yesterday they played.

I do believe, we have created some memories.

Friday Night Leftovers

• It's been waaaaaaaayyyy too long since I have joined in on Friday Night Leftovers
• The weather here in Missouri is so all over the place. 
• Tuesday afternoon I went for a 6 mile run, because it was in the 60's
• Wednesday evening right when I was heading upstairs for bed, Kinsley came out of her room covered in vomit
• The two of us "slept" downstairs.  
• There was not much sleeping, as she was vomiting all through the night and early morning.  
• Thursday morning we woke up to 30 degree weather (just two days after 60 degree weather) 
• Around 11:00 a.m. I was notified that Addy would be getting released from school @ 1:30 (it was sleeting), which meant the twins (well, healthy Eligh) would not be going to school.  
• Thankfully, daddy was able to leave work around 12:45 and go pick up Addy
• I spent the afternoon trying to keep Addyson and Eligh quiet and entertained while Kinsley fell asleep on the couch for three hours.  
• Late afternoon it started to snow, so Cody picked up some cheap sleds, and Eligh and Addyson got to go sledding in the dark.  
• School was cancelled for the day, as was majority of the base due to the road conditions.  Snow on top of ice, just doesn't mix well.  
• All three kiddos (yay, Kinsley was feeling great) got to go sledding twice today, and I am hoping for easy bed times.  
• Tomorrow was supposed to be Addyson's first basketball cheerleading game of the season, but the games have all been cancelled.  

Thank you Danifred, for hosting......boy, have I missed this :)

Big step

Look what Cody brought home?  Aaahhh!!!!  We will arrange transportation (how and when the Army comes to pack our belongings) this week.  We won't have our official flight tickets for a couple months, but this step shows it's all going to go very quickly soon. 

The most aaaaaaaaaaaamazing birthday EVER

Yes, legit, the BEST birthday I have EVER had.  I don't remember much from my childhood birthdays (my parents always made us our favorite meal, cake, and gifts, but nothing extraordinary especially because my birthday is always near Thanksgiving).

As an adult my birthdays have been less than exciting.  Cody has been around for some, as well as not being around for others.  Like last year, the big 3-0, he was away in TX, so I spent it at my parents and it was just another birthday. 

I specifically told him to NOT buy me a thing.  I don't like money to be spent on me, when we can take care of other things.  Does he listen?  NO!!!!!  When the kids came downstairs with a gift, I gave him the dirtiest look and he said it took me 10 minutes to say thank you.  I liked it, ok LOVED it, BUT the money.  Yuck, yuck, yuck!  He bought me this amazing running watch, one that I had mentioned I would like some day, not now, some day. 

The day was supposed to be a normal Wednesday, I was teaching my fitness class, but just had to bring one extra kiddo due to there being no school.  It was 8:25, and in walked Cody from work.  He said he forgot his wallet and something else.  He started my van, and didn't leave the house until after I left with the kiddos.

I walk into the community center to see it all decorated in our themed colors for class (orange and yellow) and am already in awe of these amazing ladies.  I turn around and I see Cody in his work out gear, I'm like what the heck is going on.  He has to work, or at least that is what he told me.  He comes in with some balloons and a bag that is from all the ladies who take the class.  Once the majority of the women arrived, I was forced to open up the bag (which I do not like opening things in front of people, plus I am not a receiver, I would rather give).  I open the card and there is an insane amount of money in the card, and I quickly close it.  What in the world?!!!  They told me how much they appreciated me teaching this class for free and wanted to give back to me to help pay for my certification (which more than covered the cost).  Straight tears of gratitude.  And one more amazing gift of footie jammies, which is a long standing joke in our group.

To top it all off, Cody stayed for the work out (which he has NEVER done).

It was a day where I was loved beyond any way I could imagine, and even more humbled.

Birthday eve

The night before another birthday for me has approached.  The year of 30 truly turned out to be the year of me, and it was not the plan.  In the past year I have finally put myself first, and wow, what a difference that has happened.  

In the past year I have grown a more loving, encouraging, and positive perspective.  Looking back I can see how much of a negative space I was in.  I found the right people at the right time of my life and it has been such the turn around.  It is true that we often behave in similar ways as the company we keep.  I found honest, family first, Christian, fit women who have changed my perspective on soooooo much.  I am humbled to have found them, to have been welcomed, encouraged, loved, and supported in a time I did not even know that I needed.  

I have had a closed off attitude to God and religion, and just recently (like a couple months ago) started opening back up and realizing that I don't have to practice in the way I was raised, and that it is so much more than I ever thought.  My heart is open and I am learning (slowly, but learning). 

By putting myself first, I have been a much better person all around, especially as a mother and a wife.  I have learned to let go of some of the guilt I created, and accept this life I live is MINE.  I need to do the things that make me happy, something I haven't always allowed myself to do.  

Tomorrow, I don't want anything, or expect anything, but I will celebrate this past year and hope this upcoming year will be another year full of happiness.  

Waiting for news

Today is the waiting game.  I am waiting for an email to see if passed the second and final part of the group fitness exam.

And...we are waiting to see if the Army will amend Cody's orders so we can fly as a family to Korea, vs him arriving first and then they send me and the three kiddos.

Waiting stinks....I am ready to get this planning going full speed ahead.

Two months?!

Wow, just wow....I had NO idea it has been two straight months since my last blog entry.  It can simply be explained that I have spent the last two months with my head in books, notecards, videos, and study guides prepping for my fitness exam.  I did not allow myself any free time.  If I wasn't teaching my fitness class, working out, being mom, wife, etc, I was studying.

I don't know where this blog needs to go....need to figure it out.  I have missed so many of the blogs I have followed for years and am trying to get back into it.  As well, as I have missed this place to just write.

I have taken part one of my fitness exam (I passed) and I have one more section tomorrow to take and then I can free my mind on studying and allow myself some freedom.

School year 2013 Week 1

Addyson had been pretty leery about heading off to school.  She said she just wanted to stay home with mommy and daddy, and had a couple nights here and there where she cried if we even talked about going to school.  But, the morning of her first day of 1st grade she jumped out of bed and was ready to go.  She has a new to the school teacher this year, is sitting in a desk (vs. a table), which for some reason tugged on my heart.  With one plus week under her belt, she has declared she likes first grade, she likes her teacher, and has been ready to go every single day.  Let's just hope her excitement continues.

The twins are in separate classes, and Eligh is supposed to start 15 minutes before Kinsley and end 15 minutes earlier than Kinsley.  A few days into the week the teachers have worked out a system.  Kinsley goes to Eligh's class 15 minutes early with him, and one of the teachers walks her down to her class when they start, and then Eligh goes to Kinsley's class for an extra 15 minutes at the end of the day.  Kinsley does NOT like going to Eligh's class, and we have been doing this for almost a week.  She wants to go straight to her class, and at times takes a little nudge to get her in there.  At the end of the day they are both super excited to see mommy and talk my ear off about all they have done, who they played with, what snack they had, and have developed a little competition with trying to get the best rating of the day.  Green is perfect and then it goes to blue, pink, and purple if you are just going above and beyond being good.  So far, they have both received greens or above, and both look forward to going to school each afternoon.  Just like Addyson, I hope their excitement continues as the year progresses.  

Prepping for back to school

• Back packs for the twins have been purchased
• Supplies are ready
• Meeting for the twins accomplished
• Meet the teacher night tonight and  tomorrow
• New tennis shoes for the twins purchased
• First day of school outfits ready to be worn
• Trial run of bed times and early wake ups has begun
• Five more days to go 

Have your littles started school?  How did you prep?  Are you prepping?  

Summer Picture Run Down

Struggling with big decisions

Life is sooooo dang complicated.....and I just do NOT like making big decisions.

I have been approached about looking into becoming a personal trainer as well as teaching a group fitness class.  At first I was debating back and forth for weeks until I finally decided, yes, this makes sense.  We are military and move frequently and have another 10+ years of doing this.  Teaching in various states is not an easy task, because....

1. I have to check certification in each state
2. May have to shell out some money to take a certification test
3. Study for the test
4. Hopefully pass the test
5. Research and study new curriculum (it's been many years since I have been in the classroom)
6. Then, start searching for jobs
7. We don't always know how long we will be in one state
8. Line up before and after school care in an area I do NOT know 

No matter where we move, there will always be a gym(s) on the base and off the base.  Always.  Job opportunity is there, hours could be based around kids' schedules, and in a sense still teaching.  Now, though I'm back to arguing, mostly because I hit the chapter on anatomy and it is completely out of my realm.  I am doubting myself and my ability.  I don't feel like I look the part enough.  I don't have ripped muscles and I surely don't have abs.  I feel like at age 30 I should not be starting all over.  I should not be starting a new career at this age.  I will have so much ground to make up because I am just starting down the fitness path, when most have been doing it at this age for 10 years.  What I do know, though, is...

1. I am loving fitness
2. I yearn to help others reach their goals, discover their abilities, and find happiness

Teaching online is also something I still want to do no matter which direction I go, but I am not having any luck finding a job (well, I also haven't been looking in a while - being completely honest) and I know it would be ideal, because I could take it with me when we moved and would still give me the freedom of being there for the kiddos before and after school (which is something I want to do).  

I am feeling lost, overwhelmed, and mostly confused.  I want to do what is right for my family, and I don't know what that is.  The twins are starting half day prek this year, so next year is THE year I need to be doing something.  So, this year I need to start researching and studying something so I can be ready for next year.  

Month long absence

Wow, I didn't realize it has been a month+ since my last post.  Life has changed.

So....an update of sorts

• Fitness trainer moved out of state
• Family friends moved out of state
• Lost over 40+ pounds since December
• No longer reaching to get back into the classroom
• Addy has lost 3 teeth
• Spent a couple weeks in Illinois visiting family
• Baseball season ended
• Loads of swimming
• First family camping trip
• First family trip to a baseball game - GO WHITE SOX
• Twins got accepted into the PreK program Addy went to (half day, in the afternoons)
• I have been assisting with teaching once a week a group fitness class
• I am truly happy, inspired, motivated, and enthusiastic about life
• I am now studying and changing my goals....and for once I do NOT feel guilty about the decision
• I completed another 10K race
• Kids stayed four nights alone with grandma and grandpa while daddy and I had some alone time
• Passport pictures have been taken
• Next month we "should" know where we will be living this spring

I am possibly changing the perspective of my blog.....thinking, thinking, thinking.  

Miss you all!

Summer whirlwind

• It is a constant flow of activity in this house.
• I have zero time at home for some quiet, me time. 
• Park/Playground Monday, Wednesday, and Friday mornings = kids play mommy works out
• Tuesday is story time
• Monday and Wednesday evening is baseball/t-ball (only two more games to go!)
• Wednesday and Thursday evenings Cody plays softball
• Saturday = baseball/tball games for the kids
• Breakfast, snack, lunch, naps, snack, dinner
• Addy stays up all day and insists on my full attention during the twins' nap time
• School book time with the kiddos
• Skipping naps for swimming days
• Two nights a week I run 
• Starting this weekend I will start attempting to train for a mini triathlon (that is if I don't drown in the pool)
• On top of it all, in about two weeks two of my closest friends here are moving, which makes three in the past two months.  
• I am going to have to start opening myself up to new relationships, otherwise the next nine months is going to be extremely lonely

Yay or Nay

Tough mudder in September????

I have a group, they are really pressuring me, but the cost!!!  $135 a person!!!

Vote, please